Bikram Yoga Revisited

The other day i went to a tragically Hip Concert and it was 102 degrees. And my back hurt and has for awhile. Which brought me to the conclusion that i need to get back to Bikram Yoga.

Practicing Bikram's Yoga will increase your chances of having better health and more fun on your adventures in life!!!
In my mind I hated the 90 monutes while I took Biram yoga.
In my mind I loved the 22..5 hours of the day surrounding Bikram.

I had a bit of trepidation about going back. It had to be on my own terms.

The reality of Bikram Yoga
Class is not so bad.

The teachers so far are very supportive.

Meaning : So far it has only been male teachers who work with me and know my limitations. Lets see what happens when we get the crazy 95 pound pretxel as a teacher.

It takes too much Organization

So far it has been pretty easy. my wife has been very supportive. (She had a bad experience with a previous Yoga class)

Meaning: Lets see what happens when i have top juggle kids, school and everything else.

My hamstrings are tighter than a hummingbird on caffeine.

On the bright side they seem to be loosening up.
But, that pose where you grab your ankles and touch your fore head to your knees does not work for me. Yoga will be a semi success when I can actually do this pose.

I love the feeling right after class

Yes the air is sweeter, the breeze is comforting and water melon is wonderful
But, yesterday I got home and I felt like somebody had shoveled my brain empty with an ice cream scoop.

Its okay not to be good.

I try my best but I am simply not good. So far that is okay as try my best.
Well, I barely survived the last 4 poses yesterday.
But I continue on.

Tragically Hip Do Bikram Yoga

The Tragically Hip played the Wonder Ballroom in Portland, Oregon on Tuesday Night. I have been to quite a few Hips shows and this one truly will go down as memorable.

I called the box office the morning of the show and they indicated it was a complete Hip Show, The Hip was to play from 8 until 9, take an intermission and play until 10:30.

Promptly at 8:00 Gordon Downie took the stage and rolled into a very loud opening set. The words were quite clear to those who were familiar to the Hip. To those who were not the music was simply too loud.

The Bikram Yoga Effect

I have seen shows at the Wonder Ball room before and tonight the weather outside was not particularly hot but the place was steaming literally. I honestly felt like I was in the Bikram Studio up on Fremont. I literally had that pure liquid sweat going on and my cloths were drenched. The crowd was a mass of smarmy , earthy sweat and it honestly added to the night for most of us. My wife had to go home. And there were drunk people falling down left and right.

"It could have been the heat it could have been the wine".

The Set List (A drunken Twitter text is included later)

I could look it up but the first set was pretty decent. it seemed like the new songs were a little less warmly received but I personally love the new release. Old favourites in the first set included Poets and the sparkling brand new Morning Moon. But what I remember from the first set was how truly hot this night was. I ventured outside during the intermission and I remembered it was a cool late spring evening. The people out side said it would be warmer for the second set. I did not believe them, but they were right.

I ventured in for the second set an the oppressive heat just nailed me. But the energy level in the second set was cranked up a bit. They opened the second set with two acoustic tunes. I believe it was Music at Work.

Drunken Twitter Set List from the Internets (With interpretations)

-GrDepressions suite (The Depression Suite)

-Poets -(This Rocked)

Don't wake daddy!!!!!!!!!

I'm so happyyyyyyyy (sic) about this!!!!!!

-In view

-Gift shop. Ps I love gordy

-Last Recluse

-Springtime in portland, baby! I'm too drunk for this!!!!!

-Morning Moon

-ABACT (Ahead By A Century)

-Love is a first

I'm gonna burstOMG He threw me a hankyyyyyyyyyyyyy and then I met negphil and now I can't control myself eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeekkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk!!!!!!!!!!!!!Ps

Intermission to cool off

Thompson girl

Coffee girl

Bobcaygeon

M@w (Music * Work)

grace tooh (Grace Too)

Frozen

Blow @ high dough. --Sorry canucks , not in order. Blackberry sucks.........

StruggleHoly f**k its hot in here

I believe the twitterer passed out at this point.

At one point during the show three Drunk Canadians (a double redundancy) unfurled a Canadian Flag blocking the views of another 30 drunk Canadians. Gordie did the chivalrous thing and took the flag. it was an amazing night of music and we were all in this together. Because as the new album title says, "We are the Same". And we do get it some of you are Canadian. Sweat rags and water bottles were thrown into the crowd and at the beginning of the second set the ceiling pipes stated to drip. (Well leak is not a strong enough word) it was now not only 102 degrees in the room but it was raining.

Sorry I did not come close to having a set list. I was just taking it in and enjoying the evening. As weird as it could have been it was tragically good. Even if I not Canadian. Sometimes I wonder about the Wonder BallRoom.

The Blind Leading The Celibate

CORAL GABLES, Fla. -- Former Catholic priest Alberto Cutié married his longtime girlfriend Tuesday following the scandal that preceded his leaving the Catholic Church.
According to the Miami-Dade County Clerk of Courts, Cutié and Ruhama Canellis picked up their marriage license Tuesday in Coral Gables and immediately exchanged vows in front of a judge.

A Readers comment

On a more whimsical note, perhaps he's planning on keeping his vow of celibacy after all. He's just pursuing it the way that most men do: marriage. In a few years, he'll be celibate again.

What really Happened

So they had sex. And you know what they say perfect practice makes perfect. And limpy Alberto was out of his league from years of not getting any. She hated the sex (if thats what you want to call it and called the whole thing off) and literally left him at the alter.

Just Nice Things About Great People

A poem for now

To My Wife

asleep on the couch
all serene and twinkling
like a star in a busy constellation
standing out brilliantly
when she doesn't
want any thing
to notice

reflecting
sunlight rain drops
somehow making the
light of everyday life sparkle
pefectly
hitting the eye in multi layered
sparkle dust twinkle.

Random Places Your Mind Goes

My mind like like everybody elses random goes where ever it wants to go to.
There are certain places it goes repeatedly and I have no idea reason why.
It just goes there. I just thought I would write them fdown and not force my
self to go there.

Buying Tickets to a WinterHawks Game

I always go back to sunny day in the spring where I drove to the Rose Garden
with the kids. I drove underneath the Rose Garden to get tickets (the ticket booth
is no longer located there). I have no recollection of the game it self and as I look back
it may have been tickets to a Portland Fire basketball game. I just remeber going
and getting tickets with the kids. It may have been a Thursday and I may have been happy.
The weather was clear.

And then another Friday afternoon

Where I was married and my wife had left for the weekend. I vaguely recall our
marriage was not working well but I remember a wonderfully calm Friday night.
I came home from work and mowed thelawn with a push mower.
The grass smelled nice and it was warm for the end of hockey season. I was completely
relaxed. The kids and I went to a hockey game that night. The neighbors gave us a ride
to the game and we took the Max home. It was unusually warm walking back from the Max.

Somewhat Pathetic Rant

Gum and Being Bored

• I just stole 4 pieces of gum from a co worker
• They tasted good for 30 seconds
• To keep awake I just dunked it in instant coffee.
• Its not so bad.

Cells Phones Suck

• I am 100 yards off I 5 and can not receive calls.
• Texting is insane. (Pick up the dam phone)
• I ran over the charger with my swivel chair.
• The above gum may fix it.

May 31st

• Should be labor day. Blew that load last week.
• Moved to Oregon this same weekend 12 years ago.
• It should not be 90 degees already.

These headlines today.

'This has been my dream,' spelling bee winner says.

She got a "Laodicean," reception from the crowd.

This means

a.) rousing b.) tepid c.) traditional indian gala d.) non at all

Second-place finisher Tim Ruiter of Reston, Virginia, bowed out after misspelling "Maecenas," meaning

a.) generous patron of the arts.

b.) phoresy

c. ) curt

d. ) Ned Beatty

Wedding Observations

Behind the Scenes

2 hours before the wedding we made a meal with the trout we had caught on the previous day. It was the best trout I have ever had.

My little sister Jennifer ran 12 miles the morning of the wedding. After we scaled a large rocky knoll just to find the beginning of the trail.

It rained for almost 2 weeks straight up until the day before the wedding and then the rain just stopped.

I remember Layla (the beloved wedding czar) asking me who was going to read Haiku. My brain was too over whelmed to answer coherently so randomly I pointed pointed to the next person I saw. Wonder what Erin Faireborne thought.

Pastor Tim: (concluding the rehearsal) "Does anybody have any questions.
Everybody gets quiet and and starts mentally heading
to the Rehearsal dinner.
A little voice comes out of a little girl. Our beautiful little flower girl Olivia.
Olivia: Yes I have a question.
Pastor Tim: "Yes what is it?
Olivia: My brother Becket why is standing up. Why is he standing there.

IIWII- Down the Aisle

Wow I proposed at a soccer game more than a year ago, which was one of the my greater days in life. All I wanted to do at that time is to be married to the girl I love. I forgot somewhere in that proposal was the promise that yes we would have a wedding. Its not a one day event rather a year long metaphor reminiscent of the build up to the Super Bowl. It Is What It Is. In the acronym filled corporate world we of course use acronyms and hence forth It Is What It Is will be referred to IIWII.

TO BE continued as I find free time.

I look forward to finding it.

Well it is 24 hours later and Jen got a ton of stuff done. She talked to the caterers and then to some others involved about the head count for the wedding. Of course that was ten minutes before I told her that there would be another other two year old at the wedding. Apparently I am clueless in this entire wedding process as to what is a Major issue and what is a Minor issue.

• whacks oneself on the head.
• writes not that i wont be able to read later.
• attacks next little fire.

Another Action Item- Find out when my Dad's flight arrives (I check off the task probably before I should have)

Dad - "All I know is that I am on flight 0610 on United."
I quickly look it up online and tell him 5:45.
Dad -"You have to add or subtract 3 hours to that"
Me - No that's time zone specific.

That's all my brain could handle, but soon Jen suggests we move the time of the family get together dinner. It amazes me when somebody has a complete project type of mind. Which I do not. I consider myself lucky to be walking down the aisle with somebody like that. Its pretty amazing. But what lingers in my wedding planning future. I am not in the mood to make a project plan.

To the best of my recollection we did not move the time of the family get together dinner. Thats a story for another day where I will not have time to write. But I can see it now, dinner at the Corbett Fish House (a place I truly adore), where I predict with tongue in cheek that these things will happen.

• Max devours 4 Oyster Shooters
• Riley invites Joel Prizbella as her date.
• Marina tells everybody about her deep absolute hatred of scallops
  

Back to the present for a moment. One thing we completely forgot about was that we had to get a marriage license. That is going to happen tomorrow and I am told I don't have to study for this. Much to the chagrin of my fellow co-workers I have not been able to put in sixty hour weeks, but I somehow had to draft a memo stating that I had to leave work early to get a marriage license.

In retrospect I was nervous about being late. Government agencies are a weird place to be in. Despite not being able to take a credit card or a check, YES CASH ONLY, they were all really nice and knew what thet were doing. Neither Jenna or I bothered to even write down the address on the Multnomah County Marriage License Place and both arrived at random places and times. At least the Multnomah County Marriage License Place staff knew what they are doing.

The other day I was sitting at my desk with these numbers on my scratch pad.

9636, 9701, 9715 9638

9536, 9636, 9717, 9228

One was a list of of the numbered pre wedding photos I had chosen for the sign in book. The other list were project id numbers for a report I was semi-mindlessly preparing. I just hope I didn't send Jen project ids. That may not end well. I am fairly confident I did not. And the last thing we need to working on at work is my wedding plans. I am capable of fumbling these by myself.

Then there is the subject of Haikus -Weasked people to submit Haikus along with thier invites.

Here are some examples

Elements of a good marriage....communication, humore, adventure, support, hugs, and lots lovin'?

Love and devotion, laughter, honesty, respect, Enduring Marriage

You only live once. Life is short. Have fun, fun, fun!

Open ears and heart yields forgiving nature. Contentment results.

Lifetime of smiles. sparkle in each other's eyes. Always, everywhere.

There are times when silence has the loudest voice.

To make great marriage use ears more often than mouth. Dogs have this down pat.

Two dry martinis mixed by him and shared with you. Relax at day's end.

Happiness is my wife walking away from me in her leather chaps. (Thanks Greg and Kris!!!)

The question of the day is whether they should be read just like this or whether the wedding team had editorial input. I say noy, but tahts a story for another day.

The Trail Blazers Enigma

This team always surprises me and I root for them more than any team I have ever rooted for. But Houston and McKenzie River we have a problem. It works like this.

• We are getting married next week.
• Weddings are expensive.
  
• We have tickets to all the games.
• The tickets are expensive.
• The second round of the playoffs will mostly be during wedding week where we will be away in McKenzie River and the Beach.
• It would be easier on our hectic lives if we did have to deal with the second round of the playoffs.
• Like Pavlov's Dog the trumpet calls.
• We want the Blazers to win it anyway.
• With all our hearts.
• We will deal with it then.

And then there is this series. One of the fruits of being a season ticket holder is you get to go to the game. That is if your schedule can afford it. I took an assignment to teach at night this month. I love teaching. It pays the bills. Well it actually only pays for Blazers tickets. Its known in some circles as disposable income.

But

• Our beloved Blazers seem to be playing on nights I teach.
• And I teach I must.
• Game 2 I left the class out early so that they would not get stuck in post game traffic.
• Meaning I could watch the rest of the game on television.

We play again next Tuesday the night I once again have class.

I need to hatch a plan.

I love You Now Have a Sex Change

Actress Lindsay Lohan and DJ Samantha Ronson flaunted their relationship from New York to Dubai. Katy Perry's song "I Kissed a Girl" topped the charts. "The L Word," "Work Out," and "Top Chef" are featuring gay women on TV, and there's even talk of a lesbian reality show in the works.
Certainly nothing is new about women having sex with women, but we've arrived at a moment in the popular culture when it all suddenly seems almost fashionable -- or at least, acceptable.

Well in my opinion this makes a ton of cents.

• No problems with the toilet seat thing


• Things don't come in jars that need opening any more.
• Drills, Circular Saws and Dry Wall now are made for both sexes.
• Its all about communication, why learn a second language.
• No wet spot arguments. (Do people really argue about that?)
• If I were a woman, and I am not I would date a woman because they smell better and taste bettter.
• And Its Portland, Oregom where 11 out of 10 woman are dating woman.

April 17th

April 17th

A soccer game of sorts
where I got down on my
knees and asked the
girl I love to marry me.



One year ago today
and 20 days from now
we walk down the
aisle eternally.



And I thank you for
falling into my life like
glitter out of the
sparkle jet stream.

My New Friend the Blind Guy

Last Week

• I teach class at a local college.
• My style can be a bit random.
• I teach with the door open.
• I noticed an obviously blind guy walking down the hall.
• Yelling where is the recycling bin?
• Somebody pointed him to the trash can.
  
• I walked out of my class and pointed him to the recycle bin.
• He thanked Me.
• I walked back into my room and continued teaching.

This Week

• I walked into my school building and my new friend was looking for the elevator.
• I showed him where it was.
• He said Thank You.
• I went to my class and started teaching.
• I gave the students a lab and walked out in the hall and noticed my friend on a chair.
• I asked him what class he was taking.
• He answered "A Plus" a programming class.
• I told him I teach another programming class.
• I invited him to sit in the class some day.
• He said Thank You.
• and smiled.
• He asked me what kind of car did I drive because he could not hear it earlier in the parking lot.
• In my mind I tried to remember was he death or was he blind. (Its been a long day).
  
• I said a Prius then remembered they are very quiet cars.
  
• He said cool How long have you had it.
• I said its a year old. I l love the car.
• His Answer was "Can I drive it?"
• I went back to blindly teaching.
  

More DipShits

There is no research being done here and I do not watch this show at all except when my fiance had it on the other night for the 13 hour season finale.

This is the worst television I have ever seen. My fiance was watching it and I got a gist of what was going on.The guy is a FuckWad.....(But Mom approves)The little kid is being manipulated. -No comment needed.The dumpee (while hot) -should punch the other chick, Mommas boy and my television. The bachelor - will hit on the male host of the show eventually.the heir apperent - must give good head. So thats what i think of that collasal train wreck.

Speaking of train wrecks

Tonya Harding lashes out at President Obama

PORTLAND -- In a recent interview for HBO's "Real Sports with Bryant Gumbel," Oregonian and infamous figure skater Tonya Harding lashed out about President Obama’s use of her name in a past speech.
Back when he was still on the campaign trail in 2007, Barack Obama talked about how the pundits said he should “knee cap her” or “do a Tonya Harding on the front runner,” referring to his main contender at the time, then U.S. Senator Hillary Clinton

He has this country to think about, he has the candidacy to think about, he has the war to think about, and he has to bring me up? What the hell is important in this world today?” she responded.
“But guess what, I get jobs (BLOW JOBS) because he used my name on national television, because people forgive who Tonya Harding is. All publicity is good publicity.”

Winco House of Horrors

You know those couples where the guy is a complete dead beat and is incapable of doing anything. Well the other day we were in the Grocery store and the couple in front of had their provebial heads up their butt.

Winco, the fine (sic) grocery store and mis-fit collection that it is, requires customers to bag their own groceries. The couple in front of us had no grasp of this. As their groceries accumulated in the conveyor belt this couple just chitted and chatted and did nothing to get their groceries into bags. One must excuse my myopia as we were in a bit of a hurry as we were meeting somebody in the next hour.

Finally half the couple in front of us suddendly realized they had to bag. Of course Mr Man of the Couple just stood and chatted inane bullshit while his partner packed all of the groceries. I see this kind of behavior all the time. But this was a gay couple and it was a bit unexpected. Some people argue wrongly that giving gay couples the right to marry gives them extra rights.

I beg to differ, as was proven to me that one partner in a relationship being a complete tool and dip shit gives the entire gay community the absolute right to marry and prosper.

I am going to turn the economy around all by myself

Yes that is my job here to turn the economy around. Life is about perception. Our media does nothing but report bad news which of course feeds into the frenzy of gloom and doom and people react accordingly. No, not with an accordion, but rather people tend to fuel the fire with calculated reaction. That is they do predictable things such as not buying anything, well except beer, cigarettes and ,ironically the IRA of the ages, the fabled lottery ticket.

But when the news is happy and sunny people in this country buy real products like guns, high definition televisions and tickets to the opera. All are non essential but all part of a life worth living. (Not sure about the Guns) Well the intent of this blob (some call it a blog) is to turn the economy around with all the good news that is fit to print or just observations from happy people or in some cases delusional's with conviction.I just got my first sign that the world is going to be okay. Sent to me from my favourite Canadian on the planet and this is a startling photo. Not sure if it is photo shopped but, I don't ever remember seeing this in my sky. Canadian Geese have wonderful foresight and I know they are headed here.

And here is a nice little story from that psuedo monopoly up in Washington. At least when they fire people they seem to be doing it right. Do not click Here.

Slow Down

Life is way to busy. This week I have some tough times and some great times with my family and that is pretty cool thing.

Max was describing a kid in first grade (Max is in fifth) that he mentors. He described the kid like this.

"He cute , kind of the right size, he is kind like having an IPOD".

Riley says she gets home sick when she she is not at home and Marina is walking around the house beaming that she got 19 out of 17 on her math test.

And my wife to be is upstairs sleeping. She's hot even when she is sleeping.

The dryer is pounding away with Max's sneakers thumping on each side.

Other than that it is quiet.

its nice to slow down and take it all in.

Looking Rediculous

As we drive down the road, this time of year, there is always a guy dressed up like Uncle Sam waving a sign. The kids and I always have a good laugh as we lament that being a pretty bad job and we wonder how he feels. Lately on my evening runs I would stop on his street corner and have little inane conversations with him.

Discussions like "Hey is that outfit Tax Deductible"
"Ha Ha -No Its Not"

We had developed a banter.

Well today I ventured out to our usual Tuesday night run. I just wanted stop in and say hello to the couple setting the run whom had just had a baby. When I get there I had forgot the run was to celebrate the once flat chested mother's newly created breasts. Soon two girls pinned two inflated baloons on my jacket and I thought nothing about it. I needed to get home and finish the curry I was cooking at home. So a mile later whom do I run into but the guy dressed up like Uncle Sam waving a sign. He just looked at me in hysterics. He said nothing. Just laughed like crazy.

Which he was.

Key Things -Where are They

Key Ingredients

We have important day to day things that hold our lives together. These things change constantly and where we put them seem to change constantly.

My Substance

(For those scoring at home please list 10 physical items important in your day to day life and from memory and recall where they are right now) . Please do not include your spouse or partner because if you do not where they are you have bigger problems than locating your key.

Here are Mine

1. Keys - In the front room on the credenza - I think.
2. Jen's Keys - I have no idea.
3. My son Max's soccer stuff -that's his deal (trouble looming).
4. Work Badge -on the kitchen table (I think)
5. A1 Running Shoes - right behind me.
6. The New Submarines Cd - I wish I knew.
7. Lucy The Escape Beagle- snuggled with Jen in Bed. (I think).
8. The TV Remote -best guess the sofa cushions.
9. My Day Timer - By my keys. (One key item dependent on another may be a problem)
10. Tickets to The Next Blazers Game - (Right where they have been for the last five years)
    

And the bonus Question
When you meet somebody new how do you remember their name. (Just Circle One)

1. You are too busy worried about how you appear to them you never hear their name.
2. You use an association. Hi "My Name is Maria" . You think 'oh one of Columbus's sailing ships'.
3. You write the new name down some where.
4. I never really thought about it.
5. I just remember it comes easy to me.
6. Keys - I think they are in my jacket pocket- I think.
7. Other.

Math Is a Religion

Just observations on a Normal Wednesday

I am not a big fan of 8:00 meeting but today’s meeting was just perfectly fine. I walked away with very little action items and in general I feel pretty good. The curry from last night seems to be reminding me that I had curry last night.

My work place is crazy, or maybe I make it crazy. I have not been able to make it around to do my green belt training. Well I got a note today from the administrator that I have until May the 12th to get that done. Need to talk to my boss so that I can actually set aside that time to get it done. I have a habit of taking on too much and not doing this stuff, some call it being a victim, others simply a team player.

At 10:00 almost everyday the system churns to a crawl. Opening the simplest documents is a chore. Well I just had a brainstorm and of course off the cuff decided today it would be cool to join the Peace Corp. I think that’s an extension of the book I am reading as well as some of the mindless things we do during the day.

Well at least I got a walk in today. 1.5 miles but its better than a zero.

Spaghetti Tacos?

Wheat Free Pasta.

Your Own Sphegetti Sauce

Onions

Tomato

Lettuce

Hot Sauce

Cheese

Corn Taco Shells

Fill Tacos with Spaghetti and Sauce. Top with Cheese (first) tand what ever veggies that you want. It is very important to use Japanese Serving Bowls. This is according Riley. When the kids have something in mind by all means go with it.