Thursday, October 29, 2009

Sprinting Toward DunceHood (STD's)

Sprinting Toward Dunce Hood

If I ever have to talk to Sprint Customer Service again in my life please put me out of my misery. I happen to be the worst phone person on the planet , (actually probably many planets)
and Sprint happens to have the worst customer Service that I have ever experienced.

So i cancelled their piece of crap phones basically because of their inane customer service.
So I am here with a phone bill with a phone number that has not been used in 2 years.

One would think that is a slam dunk as I try to cancel an account.

But of course I did what any sensible person would do, I destroyed all the pins to an account that I do not have.

And of course for all 7 people I had to talk to I needed the stupid god damn pin.
It used to be in my wallet on a blue piece of paper but it is not anymore.

I talked to Lesley and she was lost and she transferred me to some lady who would only give me her employee number.

Then Sandra wanted my pin and eventually Nicky got into my account just asking for the account number. She said she reversed what was left of the bill and promptly transferred me to

Otis F***en Thorpe Employee Number WQ895955 an Account Manager in Account Services.

I asked Nicki if the big O (Otis) needed my PIN and Nicki assured me she did not.

Me - Hi Otis I would like to cancel my account.

The Big O- May I have your PIN please.?

(Calculation on Probability on Arnie's words being random.)
Back 'o the envelope calculation: assuming every gubernatorial communication had seven lines, separated into a group of 4 and 3, the probability that it would spell the phrase shown is 5.519648 x 10^-12. Very Large
Since most communications are not in this format, this is probably an over estimate. In short, it is not a chance event.

So my response to Sprint

F irst your service is bad
U nless you hate
C ustomers
K nowing that

Y our phones suck
O ut loud and your company is
U seless.

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